Victim Support Guide

VICTIM SUPPORT GUIDE.png

We often hear news about women being molested, raped or sexually abused. It is something we as a person, have got used to. We may feel bad about it for a few mins but we tend to move on with our routine life and forget about it. But what happens when a close friend, a relative or your siblings go through it. Are we really prepared to handle such a situation? Do we really know how to react to someone who confides in us something horrible that they have gone through? Honestly, most of us don’t know. It takes courage and a lot of thought for the victim to open up to someone first. How that person(or we) react to the victim is hence very important. When a female gets physically abused or molested and therefore, is mentally disturbed, she needs someone to listen to her. We often notice on a daily routine life, women go through lots of issues relating to physical abuses. It can be while traveling or at an office place or at a college or any random place and sometimes at home. But such cases are usually ignored and women happen to move on without sharing it with anyone with the fear of being blamed. For instance, a woman at the office is physically abused by her close colleague and she may not have any proof to tell others. A colleague might be a good friend or trusted person so the victim will already be in another thought of being betrayed. She may look out for someone to listen to her incidence and understand her. At this scenario, the victim is already in a mental stress and needs someone to be there for her. Unfortunately, in such cases, even logical people will blame the victim by telling her it is her mistake of being so close friends’ with a colleague.Basically, people often compare such scenes with rape and don’t take it as seriously as raped ones.Remember no victim forces herself for something bad to happen. These incidences have a very negative impact on the victims. Women are also blamed for being over friendly, not dressing appropriately and what not.

The do’s and don’ts  to be followed to help or support the victim:

  • The foremost important thing is- do not blame the victim in any circumstances.
  • Listen to the whole story patiently. (Listen only when the person is ready to share it.) Do not force an individual to describe everything at once. Give them time.
  • Do not comment on her provocative attire.
  • Help her follow up any physical or mental checkup needs.
  • Keep telling victim you are there with her and she should not be scared of anyone.
  • Try to find out the attacker and lodge a complaint.
  • Make sure you help her out to get justice. If ever she decides to give up the process of law, motivate her to continue the process to win the case. If she does not want to proceed further, don’t force her.
  • Whether or not the victim  gets the justice, give her mental therapy every day until she manages to live by herself.
  • Do not gossip about the incidence to others unless the victim is comfortable with it.
  • Furthermore, if you see the victim has moved on, then do not remind them of the past life again and again. As no one forgets the past life, but it is more depressing when the topic is been brought up often leading to get hurt .
  • Some women may make life changes due to the incidence, support her.
  • If the victim is comfortable, help her by setting up or join a support group for her to recover.
LET'S SUPPORT TOGETHER SHARE THE GUIDE TO HELP SOMEONE IN NEED. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. WE ARE WITH YOU..png

Note: 
You need to follow these rules for any victim irrespective of gender. 

 

 

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96 comments

  1. What a great post! I agree listening is very important, and “do not blame the victim in any circumstances” should be taught, I guess… So often victims are blamed, and it’s just completely wrong and unfair.

  2. It is indeed very important to stay near that person and don’t go away, be there as a friend for as long as it takes. Even if she will feel better, she will have moments when here world will fall apart again and she will need a shoulder to cry on.

  3. Nothing disgusts me more than such violence and mental trauma women undergo at the hands of chauvinist beasts. But, instead of supporting the woman, she is seen as a reinforcer of the act. You have dealt with such sensitive topic very sensibly. Sensitisation is needed and your tips are welcome in this regard.

    1. Thank You Ratisha 🙂 Wrote this post just to share among other people, as my own experience and other girls often go through similar mental trauma and not much people know the right way to deal with innocents…If you want to share this post then go ahead to aware many people about this topic 🙂 have a good day 🙂

  4. It’s frustrating to hear people blame victims, especially since they typically have no idea what they are talking about. You bring up great points and its important to spread awareness on this. Thanks for sharing!

  5. It’s so sad that when something happens like that, the victim is blamed. Thank you for your very informative post.

  6. The post has been very well-written and you have covered almost every point. It is so important to deal with the victims in the correct manner or else their motivation will be totally shattered.

    Fatima | http://www.blogsbyfa.com

  7. Another read, and it still seems as fresh and well-written as before. Good job!

  8. It bothers me when victims are blamed or when they feel pressured that they are the faulty party. Just wrong! Thanks for sharing 🙂

  9. Thank you for writing such a post! NO, it is not Ok when a woman is victim of any kind of violence (it wouldn’t be ok neither if it was a man!). YES, we need to help victims and consider victims as victims and do not blame them! I am working a lot on this topic, so I am glad to read about it on blog…

  10. These are some really great tips. It is important to be very supportive in hard times like these and I cannot imagine what it must be like to go through this!

  11. Blaming them could push them to a suicidal thoughts. I think they’re few people who can handle this problem professionally, but if the victim is close to you, they might open up for you and then don’t feel like it’s a burden because it’s going to take a long time for them to recover. Just don’t let them down and don’t push them up.

    Gigi |¤ https://bmobshelldrawer.wordpress.com/

  12. Thank you for sharing. Loving post

  13. Listening to the victim is the most important and very least that we can for her. Some are really afraid to be judged and blamed that’s why they just keep it to themselves.

  14. journeyfreak says:

    Nicely written post and great tips on how to deal with such an uncomfortable and scary situation. Thank you for sharing.

  15. You brought a great awareness of this issue. All the points above are so crusial to know. Thank you for sharing this important post.

  16. A really great post! Very important to talk about. I agree with not commenting on what they wear, it doesn’t matter if you walk round naked, it doesn’t give people the right to touch you!

  17. This is such a great and thought provoking post. You said it so right about what we should do to even begin to help the victim.

  18. Thoughtful post. I once saw a post where it showed how ridiculous it is to blame the victim. It was a parallel something like a picture of a man that had been robbed, and they jumped on with the ridiculous types of things folks say like “when you dress in a nice suit, what do you expect would happen, flaunting that you have money” It became so apparent that the logic wasn’t there.

  19. I have never known someone close to me to go through these situations – that doesn’t mean they haven’t as people still don’t always talk about it. Thanks for sharing

  20. I think people who were abused and came to us need our help. They came because they trust us, and therefore, it is extremely important that this trust is never violated. It is important too, to get help with the consent of the victim. Professional help.

  21. VIctim blaming is a huge issue unfortunately, and this is a really wise post on how to correctly deal with such things.

  22. Great Post. Its such a sensitive topic. Nobody deserves to go through this. Thanks for sharing☺

  23. Great topic, people need to know how and what to do when a victim comes to them… Never blaming the victim is SO important, and you’re right it takes a lot of courage for a victim to come forth with such a topic… it makes them feel embarrassed, used, and well, a victim! keep up the good work!

  24. I couldnt agree more ! Listen Listen Listen , when someone has been hurt listening is one of the best you can do. Nobody deserves to go thru such things

  25. It is a subject that needs awareness and its amazing that you have done so. Very interesting read, thanks for sharing!

  26. I was physically and emotionally abused by my stepmother and it gave me such low self esteem and poor confidence that I find it hard to trust people I don’t know.

    1. Once the trust is been betrayed its difficult to trust anyone. And its okay if you don’t trust others as long as you have confidence and trust in yourself ,you don’t need someone else 🙂 Being independent is great thing 🙂

  27. Wise important words that we need to remind to everyone regularly. For all the girls (and also all the boys, as it is not a women cause only) we care about.

  28. Good post! It is sososo important to never blame the victim… I hate when people say “oh well she was asking for it because of the clothes she was wearing.” Not even close, thanks for providing some insight.

  29. A victim is always a victim regardless of everything, there is nothing more wrong, obscene and horrible than to infer on the victim as if anything happened to her …

  30. Thank you for making this type of a post. I have dealt with sexual assault and it’s very hard to go through feeling alone and like you can’t trust many, if anyone. I wish I had known these things 12 years ago when it occurred. I am always an open ear to friends, regardless of their situation. Counseling is a very helpful thing to do to many as well.

    Very good advice.

  31. So true. I would never blame a victim. I hate when that is done. Like when they ask, “Are you sure there wasn’t a mistake?” Uh, no.

  32. Thank you for sharing this. I used to work in the public health field, specifically sexual assault. Victim blaming is never ok in any situation.

  33. Jesusa Gilliam says:

    I agree, it is hard to respond to someone who is opening up to you about their tragedy. These are great helpful tips to dealing with this situation. I feel listening is very important. Thank you for sharing.

  34. Mosaics Lab says:

    You bring up very important and valid points. It makes my blood boil that some people still blame the victim, it just hurts so much. Thanks a lot for sharing!

    1. Yes,Mosaics. I had been through this experience and hence, the same reason made me write it.

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