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Victim Support Guide

VICTIM SUPPORT GUIDE.png

We often hear news about women being molested, raped or sexually abused. It is something we as a person, have got used to. We may feel bad about it for a few mins but we tend to move on with our routine life and forget about it. But what happens when a close friend, a relative or your siblings go through it. Are we really prepared to handle such a situation? Do we really know how to react to someone who confides in us something horrible that they have gone through? Honestly, most of us don’t know. It takes courage and a lot of thought for the victim to open up to someone first. How that person(or we) react to the victim is hence very important. When a female gets physically abused or molested and therefore, is mentally disturbed, she needs someone to listen to her. We often notice on a daily routine life, women go through lots of issues relating to physical abuses. It can be while traveling or at an office place or at a college or any random place and sometimes at home. But such cases are usually ignored and women happen to move on without sharing it with anyone with the fear of being blamed. For instance, a woman at the office is physically abused by her close colleague and she may not have any proof to tell others. A colleague might be a good friend or trusted person so the victim will already be in another thought of being betrayed. She may look out for someone to listen to her incidence and understand her. At this scenario, the victim is already in a mental stress and needs someone to be there for her. Unfortunately, in such cases, even logical people will blame the victim by telling her it is her mistake of being so close friends’ with a colleague.Basically, people often compare such scenes with rape and don’t take it as seriously as raped ones.Remember no victim forces herself for something bad to happen. These incidences have a very negative impact on the victims. Women are also blamed for being over friendly, not dressing appropriately and what not.

The do’s and don’ts  to be followed to help or support the victim:

  • The foremost important thing is- do not blame the victim in any circumstances.
  • Listen to the whole story patiently. (Listen only when the person is ready to share it.) Do not force an individual to describe everything at once. Give them time.
  • Do not comment on her provocative attire.
  • Help her follow up any physical or mental checkup needs.
  • Keep telling victim you are there with her and she should not be scared of anyone.
  • Try to find out the attacker and lodge a complaint.
  • Make sure you help her out to get justice. If ever she decides to give up the process of law, motivate her to continue the process to win the case. If she does not want to proceed further, don’t force her.
  • Whether or not the victim  gets the justice, give her mental therapy every day until she manages to live by herself.
  • Do not gossip about the incidence to others unless the victim is comfortable with it.
  • Furthermore, if you see the victim has moved on, then do not remind them of the past life again and again. As no one forgets the past life, but it is more depressing when the topic is been brought up often leading to get hurt .
  • Some women may make life changes due to the incidence, support her.
  • If the victim is comfortable, help her by setting up or join a support group for her to recover.
LET'S SUPPORT TOGETHER SHARE THE GUIDE TO HELP SOMEONE IN NEED. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. WE ARE WITH YOU..png

Note: 
You need to follow these rules for any victim irrespective of gender. 

 

 

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Cycle Of Depression

         “Depression” term is ubiquitous now.

Cycle Of Depression

Olden times, depression was not common to hear. Possibly, people had it but were not aware of the term for it. Since, the internet is accessible to almost all parts of the world now, spreading awareness about depression has become easier. We can notice that campaigns are hosting mental health awareness programs. Depression is a disorder but people are now using the same term for representing sadness. Be it an excess of sadness or depression, there are things that can be helpful to both the things.

During depression, an individual will not have any interest in doing anything. Some people lose their hope in living a normal life. They do not like social interactions.Some of them may stop caring about the ones they love.  Extrovert / ambivert /introvert all of them can feel depression. An individual may show the habit of procrastinating work. The remedy is to reverse these things.

Memories are sometimes hard to deal with. We keep having same old memories passing through our mind often. Remembering good times will keep the mind healthy. But, constantly bad memories pop ups in mind will make things difficult for the person. It affects routine life. It does not let the person to move on to the next phase of life.

Yes, in our life, we meet people that hurt us unexpectedly. We get hurt by our family and friends behavior. We meet strangers who may bring up a fight in the middle of public. We dwell in the thoughts of why someone left us with no reason. We come across the rumors about our character. We face its consequences. We see our people leaving us by believing rumors. When someone leaves us with misunderstandings and do not even bother to discuss the matter, we feel broken. These betrayals and heart-wrenching thoughts run through our minds consistently. We seek for the answers wondering why these things are happening to us.

Often after the small or huge argument, relations end but it’s not always the same. It does not end completely in some cases. There is usually one person waiting at the other side for starting to talk again. There are times, when both sides wait until someone makes a move. When both expect the other person to take a step, ultimately they move on with the life without trying out.

Build the relationship strong enough that no third person shall be able to break it up. The good practice is to discuss matters. Do not walk away without giving a reason. Do not leave someone by hearing rumors from others. Do not assume anyone’s behavior. Try to understand things from different perceptions. Whenever necessary, apologize. It is always better to end the chapters completely. Incomplete chapters of life has the chances of troubling your mind.

We often see there are couples who move on easily. Break up then hook up with someone else immediately and it goes on. Everyone has their own emotion status management.Running away from emotions does not solve issues. It is advisable , sometimes give time to yourself for  understanding what do you exactly want or what are you looking for?

Most of the depressed people have mood swings. They can feel like crying anytime. They can easily get angry. They have the tendency to feel sad without any reason. Whilst some go through the life events that change them into a depressed person.

We shall not ignore depression. We have to put our 100% effort in changing ourselves. The counselors/therapists will try their best to heal us. Taking initiative at the earliest to fight against depression shows the quick results.

We need to analyze the reason for our emotions. We need to look out for the things that can fix it up.The first step to heal from any mental health illness is self-realization. It’s a wake-up call to begin the process of leaving the depression phase. In the beginning steps, you realize what things you had been missing out in your life. The best thing to do is stop the clock of past events. Whatever happened in the past, keep it as past chapters of life. Do not carry it in the present or the future.  The second step is to overcome depression or any sadness is to keep yourself active. Involve yourself in any work or hobbies. Find time to meet your loved ones. Join some social groups or events. Eat healthy food on regular intervals. Drink healthy beverages. We suggest these things to everyone, because these are helpful in building the healthy thoughts in mind.

Easy to say, difficult to do. When the past things are themselves the reasons affecting the present and the future, don’t think about it as the end of good things. Always have in mind, the world is big. We have millions of opportunities to change our life in whichever way possible. Sometimes fate cannot be with us. But, we need to keep going on for what we want.

We cannot replace loss of our loved ones. But, we have to continue living a normal life. Everyone is here in this world for a reason. We all are playing our roles. There is a saying, ”Some of life’s best lessons are learned at the worst times.”

We need to feel every emotion. Experience it , let it sink in us. Let it get out of us as the time passes. We have to move on by completing all the phases of emotions to keep our mind crystal clear.

 

Life will knock you up multiple times in different forms. You will experience the unexpected things. But ,remember one thing you have to get up ,wake up again and begin the best. Everyone is going through something in their life. We need to remind others, how important and valuable they are !

One of the best thing in life is the emotion we feel in our heart.

Jetpack

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Letter to my daughter who smokes!!!

Letter to my daughter who smokes!!!

My angel,


I will not sit with you and give you a lecture. I am sure you may not hear half of my words. You will avoid my discussion about smoking. I am not complaining to you to stop smoking. I will never ask you to do that. It is your life, your rules.Do whatever you want! Live the way you love to be.
People say smoking is injurious to health. I don’t believe it. Because smoking is just one thing. There are lots of other reasons to count on which affects health. It is believed that smokers die early. I don’t believe that either. As I have seen non-smokers die early too. We often watch some smoking scenes in movies/series, wherein the character who smokes has actually got some strong attitude. We also see small blur statement in the corners, “Cigarette smoking is injurious to health”. Who cares about that statement right? Look at the attitude in the scene; we are already inspired by the scene that smoking gives the appearance of some kick-ass attitude. We even notice some writers saying what keeps them awake is coffee and a pack of cigarettes which refreshes their mind to come up with stories to be written on.

I met a girl today. She is 15 and already smoking a pack per day. She told me that she is looking forward to having a singing career. Anyone of us could predict she may not achieve her dream. Because smoking affects voice quality. It gives you a nasty voice. Someone told her that few singers do smoke. But that someone agreed to our discussion that people use machines to give good quality for the recorded voice. You know you can be popular with machine quality voice, but recording a natural voice song is much blessing. They say it is difficult to give birth to a child when a couple or one of them smokes a lot. I don’t believe it completely. Although most couples go through the same situation, I have seen some people have well-born children.

 


Honey, you are in your late teens and underdeveloped society or some friends around you may call you as a bad girl. Every time you smoke, all of them might give you a hatred look. You may have friends to hang out and all of you are probably enjoying having weeds together. It’s all fun until you cross the limit. I am not stopping you from smoking my sweetheart. There is something more to smoking and drinking.


Death is not the scariest thing. The worst thing is to lose your mind and self -respect. Smoking leads to losing a good memory and patience at the earliest for many people. It plays with your emotions. It is possible for some smart people to lose their common sense too.  They may talk a lot about the things that do not make sense. They lose interest in jobs or life and are always under stress. They can not find happiness apart from drinks & puff. You may think that you love your boyfriend a lot today and you will not love a pack of cigars more than him. I can bet you, dear, that yes, smoking is an addiction. Once you get trapped in addiction, no love is greater than smoking for the majority of smokers. You will start looking for money every time to buy more packs and drinks. Travelling is the most fun for lots of people out there. But for smokers, they will be happy; if you just give them a pack. But they will not be happy if kept away from smoking. The mind gets used to it. It never gives you peace of mind. And one fine day you are lost, totally lost and no one can help you out. I wrote this earlier, ‘It plays with your emotions.’. It will affect your temper badly. You do see warning everywhere and some pictures of how physically it affects the body. When your friends grow up and you all get separated ,you may not find the same kind of people again. If you ever get affected physically then do not feel shy to go in public or suffer the physical pain because despite warnings  you have chosen to live like this. When you cross the limit of smoking  ,stress and anger will be your only 2 best friends forever. Smokers and non smokers can have same type of diseases. But,prolong smoking can change the person’s mental peace in the long term. I don’t want to put you in a cage and impose my principles to  you.You are set free to choose a better life or astray.  Rest I will be always there for you but I can not assure of your mind status.Society might call me as a bad parent for not restricting you from smoking. The choice is all yours 🙂 to live a better life or not . 


#Fictional Letter
Note: This is a fiction letter written on the basis of the people who lost their good life, smartness, and people because of a smoking habit. Smoking is not good for all the genders. The polluted air of smoking affects children, old age people and low immune people at a fast pace. If you don’t want to save your life, please save other innocents 🙂 Here, the letter was specifically written for the daughter.


 

 

smoke

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Find a reason to live

thepsychologicalworld

“Find a reason to live.
When you don’t have any reason to live,
don’t use the same reason for death.”

Depressions, trauma events, unfortunate life, and a life with no purpose are the reason that force people to choose suicide or hurt themselves in some way. When you are at your wit’s end , just take a break for a while.

We need to accept the fact that life will never stop teaching us a lesson. It is always a process of learning the life itself or any specific subject. I won’t deny the truth that sometimes life bites us so hardly that no positive quotes or vibes work out. I am not going to write in this post, what are the things you can do to overcome depression. I  have already written about this in other articles on the same site. I can completely understand going through suicidal thoughts is not easy. It does not mean you are a weak person. All I want to say is “You have my empathy.”  By being the part of the life’s rich pageant, you are already a winner.


Remember, you guys are strong and maybe most of you hold the life journeys that no one knows about. No one can walk on your path as bravely as you did. I know there is this void feeling and no room for happiness. Many of you may chase for happiness but may not find it easily. If we could come so far with our super powers then let’s not end it in a bitter way.

Let’s endure the challenging paths for us.

I have helped many people going through suicidal thought and attempt , which has made me write this short post.

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The Dark Tunnel

The Dark Tunnel

What if one day I get up and find out there is nothing to do at all?

It won’t be a day wherein I could feel happy to say, “Yeah! Nothing to do. I am free today.”

It’s a day with bleak weather- I happen to realize there is nothing else remaining for me to do.
Everything has ended. I have lost so many things. I have tried countless things. I could look back to my past clearly. The path from the past to the present has made me conclude that my life is all messy. The impenetrable darkness has gone inside my soul and there is no space left for any positive signs. I have turned into a cold-hearted person. I have no feelings for anyone. I reached that level of life, wherein I can’t let anyone else be a part of my world. I feel the world has drained from me. The evil thoughts have arisen in my mind. I can only regret the mistakes, not done by me, but done by others which led me to suffer. I could have blamed everyone around me, by now I chose not to blame anyone. Because for now, I am in a state of blaming myself for always compromising my own life. For the number of times, all my dreams shattered with no hopes further. Abided by all the surrounding rules, I could not achieve anything. Being crumpled with a stroke of bad luck, I could not get any answers for, “Why me ???”.


I often restored my hopes to start a new beginning, but my every journey landed up to “The End” board with no success. Having failed for hundreds of times, I did not feel bad for rejections and failures anymore. I don’t know what is the feeling of happiness for being successful in life. Maybe, if ever I reach a successful point, I would shed more tears by recalling the failure times. I would be more nervous and hold fear to cherish the success moment. Doubtless, I am tired and downtrodden. I could imagine brighter days on the way. Alas! With not much of a span, I find myself being involved with innumerable issues. 
Whenever someone asked me, “What’s wrong?”; I could fake smile and tell them nothing. At most, I could share one of the smallest ordinary issues. The truth holds as nothing was/is right.  I could only wish some magic to fix everything at once for all. My life did not go the way I planned in multiple ways, but at this stage I am fine. At a certain point in time, we accept that some things cannot be changed and often are out of one’s control. People who know my journey tide with hurdles; know somewhere it is okay if I stop going ahead. It is true: negativity must not become part of life, but sometimes on a practical basis: negativity wins over positivity. We have to balance the positive and negative vibes equally.

 

 

I wish I would wake up one day and realize my whole life had been a dream and I am actually a different person living a different life. Perhaps, a much better life wherein I could be me, myself !!!

I wrote this blog post to express what I felt at that moment. I was not in a depression. My feelings were based on real situations. Through this article, many people could relate to it. This post is to show how a depressed person feels. It depicts how crushed a person feels when everything goes against her/his life. We see people who lack empathy. People who do not take other’s emotions easily. People who are unable to understand someone’s emotion. We do come across the ones who will not realize what willpower it takes for going through the hurdles. I genuinely feel we should not break anyone to the extent that they lose the meaning to their life. When we see someone’s life is falling apart, we shall try to lend a hand to uplift them in order to kick start life again.


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In Search Of Justice !

IN SEARCH OF JUSTICE.png

I gathered all my hopes up,
I became the strongest person again.
I decided not to give up.
I demurred,
I was searching for justice.
I had the right requirements to qualify
but, I was rejected.
Bribe made things easier for someone.
Fake proofs were termed real.
Maybe Deplorable.
Silly me, I was searching for justice.

I had all the proofs,
I had supportive people,
I was on the right path,
but I was searching for justice.

Many lawyers were murdered,
murder cases turned as absurd suicides,
alibis vanished,
but, I was searching for justice.

Bold journalists were shot,
proofs were buried,
the story was remade abruptly,
but, I was searching for justice.

Nations hosted meetings,
Dealing were done,
Innocent armies
sacrificed their life.
Why not seek justice?

Rape victims were banished,
Rapists were absolved  & worshipped,
matter of life & death,
matter of having fun,
but, I was searching for justice.

Poor got poorer paying the pennies,
Rich got richer by exempting from taxes.
Charity was the way to exemptions and needers.
Politics played the best game.
Looting became a fantasy.
I was searching for justice.

The actual prisoners get the luxury life,
The innocent prisoners die in hell.
How can I not search for justice.?

Culprit was given VIP protection,
Witness was attacked multiple times,
Yes ! I am in search of justice.

The battle of fair and unfair,
The battle of theist  & atheist,
The quarrels in mind,
Yet , I was searching for justice.

The wars are plotted.
The innocents are slaughtered.
The criminals are winning.
The helpers are crawling.
I could not acclimate,
Hence, I am searching for justice.

Deceivers framed themselves
as God/Goddess/Gurus.
Received unlimited blind followers.
Innocents were calumniated,
Hope there is justice out there.

Astrologers beating scientists,
Solution to all problems!
No one saw future,
But, astrologers earned the future
emptying coward’s pockets.
I am searching for Justice in every inch.

Battles for water resources,
Battles for food supplies,
Battles for land rights,
Unforgotten we are all same humans,
Our roots are the same.
Ergo, who has found real justice?

Good people will give rise
to more good people.
Bad people will end
at one time of era.
It’s not the fable,
It’s the reality,
Into  the abyss,
I can’t stop searching for justice.

Alas ! I am not looking for someone
with the name Justice.

 

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