There are three types of people: One who looks like has nothing at all and actually, there is nothing … One who looks like has everything from other’s view but, in reality has nothing .. One who looks like has everything from other’s view and has really everything but, the person does not realise the value of having everything…
I always loved capturing photos. I could do it well with any device. Beginning with kodak rolls, Vga to Lumia and at last, I brought my first Nikon D5200 in the year 2017. I generally use Nikon 55-200mm lense. I love taking Bokeh photography.
I have a Flickr account wherein I am not really much active now. Like other websites nowadays, Flickr has also come up with the benefits for premium members and that’s where free members can lose out the views on their profile. My account is free. But, through Flickr, I got a chance to get real feedback from top photographers.
The first photo that got qualified for Flickr Explore is this one which also got 10k views within a day. Something which I did not expect as I have not shared it anywhere else. The favorite likes are higher than what it shows on the public page which is not a good thing. Wish it could show real favs. Many people have the same issue on their profile.
As per Indian tradition in the early morning , women put rangoli in front of the house. Rangoli is an art form that is meant to produce positive energy for the home. The same tradition is being followed by my mother.
A tradition turned into a nightmare. One of the ocd type is Scrupulousity OCD. Scrupulousity OCD involves deep religious thoughts. There is a fear of doing any mistake that will make the person angry their respective God/Goddess. It disrupts their mind when anyone goes against their ritual methods. Even the Pandits, Father or any superior person of religion will not agree with this person’s rituals. Such people will keep doing different remedies of overcoming sins repeatedly. In Hindu, there are long duration of different pujas and havans. So, the person will keep doing such puja havans every now and then. This person will not pray to God without taking bath. Even if the bath is already taken but the visit to temple or prayer to God is after few hours then the person will once again take bath prior to it. Similarly, christain person may repeatedly visit the confession room. In Muslim, while washing hands before the prayer, the person will wash his/her hands multiple times to feel the purity.
These people have strong belief in black magic. There is a fear of people doing black magic for which they find ways to protect themselves from black magic. Person with Scruplousity OCD will love preaching about God and religion to others. They want everyone to believe in their principles ,their thoughts, their rituals and follow the same.
Normally, only on occasions big rangolis or colourful rangolis are made.
But in my family, my mother started making big rangoli as compulsion for daily routine. Normal people clean the area by sweeping or they just use some cloth to wipe off the floor. Following it, they make simple and small or border rangolis. My mother used to do same.
How the repetation and behavior changed?
The next step, she did is that she made me put big rangoli for complete month on every festival. Indians have so many festivals by which one can know the number of days of we designing rangoli are higher. Then she changed to putting big rangoli daily.
Alongside, her rule was sweeping and mopping only one time before putting rangoli.
Then during festival months, (sweeping , mopping and put rangoli) twice a day.
The next thing , she started hallucinating that neighbour is doing some black magic.
She imagined ,neigbour drops Kumkum -a red powder or Angar- a grey powder on rangoli. Then she thought someone coming in front of our door daily from neighbour’s house and doing black magic. This is completely her hallucination.
How it got mixed with OCD?
She started cleaning front door and front place with dry cloth then wet cloth. She swept and mopped floor before rangoli. She changed timings of a day of putting rangoli so that neigbour don’t do black magic. It was all in her mind but she made real rules based on her beliefs. Then she forced us to create a window in the passage which is closer to the neighbour window.
Next level is this :
She sweeps the floor then mops the small floor 10 times and then cleans the beside little stone bench and door then mops the floor again . Then she cleans window with dry cloth then with wet cloth. Then she mops floor. Once again, she sprinkles water on the floor and wipes the floor with another cloth. Overall, total 4 clothes and sweeping rod , mop rod, and a bucket full of water only for this small matter.
She does not take bucket used for cleaning inside house . Because, she thinks goddess will enter house. Hence, dirt should not come inside. Therefore, the bucket should be taken inside home later after hours. You may have got confuzzled with this stanza of repeatative tasks. Imagine the same lines are actually acted in real, the amount of stress that goes around in doing the same task excess of time.
Since , Rangoli is a form of art , one could take this task positively and do it daily but the amount of stress involved with the Scruplousity OCD is unbearable. We have to avoid neighbour contact and if neigbour step out then she will think that they did black magic . Even if they don’t step out , she will still assume same because of her hallucination.
As previously explained, there is a fear of what will god or goddess do.
For example, she makes it compulsion to draw shree symbol in rangoli without fail.
Moreover, throughout the process of rangoli, she is panicked and in angry mood. Hence, anything going wrong triggers her to create a worse day for all . All these beliefs increased the hallucination and she decided to leave this place to get rid of neigbour ‘s black magic(unreal thing. ) My mother has done unbearable dramas at home for this simple things. Her mind does not accept breakage in this repeation process and anyone against her such hallucinated beliefs. This thing has broken the relationship with good neigbour. We can’t face them or talk to them because she has restricted us. If we do so, then she will create an unforgettable trauma for all.
Please note, this post has no intention of saying anything against any religions. It is based on the sources, that explain how it can involve different religions. It is more about the OCD person and less about a religion. It only shows how a strong abnormal belief reaches higher than normal belief of god or goddess and supernatural things.
Know the things:
There is a need to take precautions. Don’t take the pattern changes of your loved ones lightly because with the development of symptoms , things get uncontrollable. It will lead to inviting more mental disorder symptoms. Each task is repeated multiple times. The person does not do the work all alone but asks some family members to do it. Please note that the ocd person does not enjoy doing such stress work. This stress work also affects their emotions and they feel frustrated to do it and at the same time avoiding work will give them a breakdown. This drains energy, valuable time for all family members and acts as an obstacle for other work or self time. Doing unnecessary work daily turns into an unavoidable stress for everyone. Because of one person’s mental imbalance, other family memebers eventually get mentally affected.
Society does not accept such levels of OCD. My neighbours make fun of us . When I tried explaining them first time about her other mental disorder . They denied to accept the term, mental disorder and said, “Your mother is a weird person.”.
We can’t tell every outsider, what mental disorder is!
We can only try our best to aware the world about mental health through different mediums.
To conclude, if we have symptoms then we should accept and meet doctors for the diagnose and respective treatment. In the same way, we should be understanding towards our family member’s any mental disorder and insist them to take the treatment.
“Believe in whatever you want, but know the fine line of balancing your belief.”
I used to be surprised to see this question from many beginner bloggers. I helped in guiding many people in starting a blog. One query was common amongst all. When numerous people started asking, “How do I check my Blog?” I realized not everyone has got technical skills and computer knowledge. People enter into the blogging field from different fields, so it is possible for them to not have the right knowledge of simple things too.
I wrote the blog but where is my blog?
Here, is a complete guideline to find your blog on WordPress. It will help other bloggers who are not on WordPress too. Because the steps remain almost similar.
Step 1 :
You have written the blog and published it and now you want to share it. You want to view the display of your blog on the desktop and the Mobile. Once you are logged in WordPress, you will see the page same as this image: If you are unable to view this image, zoom your screen or right click your mouse and choose “Open image in new tab”. ( Do the same for all the images in this post.)
You can notice on the left side, there are two buttons. My Sites and Reader. Click on My Sites.
You will see the items the same as the above image on the left side of the page. On the right side, there will be names/list of your blog.
Step 2 :
There are two ways of viewing the site, the easiest way is this one.
In the left top side of the page, Right-click your mouse on the button View Site. You can now choose the option from the right-click list. You can either click: Open link in new tab OR Open link in new window OR If you are using Chrome and want to open your site in incognito mode,then Open link in incognito window
This will direct you to your site display. The image below is my site view.
I have marked red color drawing on the bit upper side. I will explain it in Step 4.
The second way of viewing your site is : Click directly on View Site button. You will see your site similar to the below image.
You can choose from the top bar, whether you want to see the display for Desktop, Tablet, Phone, Search & Social. No need to break your head more, simply choose Desktop. You can check other views later once you learn the steps in this guideline.
Click on Visit Site button on the right top side of the page. You will be redirected to your site display.
Step 4 :
What is your site URL and how do you share it with others? How will you check your site anytime? Look at this image:
The red mark part is your site URL. It is also known as the address or link of your site. 1] Just click on that link. OR Right-click and choose Select all 2] Right click mouse and choose Copy option. 3] Go to any of your social media or other sites you want to share. Right-click mouse and choose Paste option.
If you see same or similar buttons anywhere on your site, usually footer or sidebar of the site, then click on the button to share on the social media sites. You can directly click on any of the buttons. If you are already logged in to the respective social media then it will directly share on your profile. In case, you are not logged in, the window will prompt asking you to log in. After the login, the post will be ready to be shared on your site.
Through this real story, you will understand why OCD (Obsessive-compulsive disorder) cannot be treated as a JOKE for everyone.
Introducing my mother who has two types of OCD.
Neither she takes the treatment nor do my family agree to give her treatment. My father and sister never agreed to give her treatment. Over years, I tried convincing her parents and siblings, even they denied giving any help .No one in my family agreed to opt for her treatment because they thought what will society say if they come to know about her. On another hand, her behavior became a problem for the society itself and yet father and sister did not wanted to take any responsibility. I once went with her to a doctor wherein she did not know her mental check up will also be done. We went for mild health check up and doctor said she does have mental disorders.
In the OCD series, I will not talk about her other mental disorders.
I will explain the experiences of living with a OCD person . In what way, people living with OCD person as well as the OCD person should take the responsibility of curing. Additionally, this is not only a single person OCD symptoms. There are many people out there who seem to have similar behaviour.
The Normal Day:
1] Where ever we stay: a bungalow or an apartment, the front yard of the house or the front passage of the flat needs to be cleaned daily. Even if the place is already cleaned, sweepping then mopping is done early morning around 6a.m. or prior to it. The doors are again cleaned with dry and wet clothes. Throughout the day: if anyone visits home, we go outside and come back, any random person walking in the passage or a courier person or any one else steps in the front passage, then those many times the front yard is cleaned. At the end of day, again in evening the sweeping is done compulsory.
She does not do it all alone always. Sometimes she does it by herself and sometimes she orders me to do it. We cannot avoid this task. Because the consequences of ignoring her orders are not good. She can get very emotional and hurt. She may get violent and have a heated conversation with all the bad words. This simple thing can change into one of the bad days.
One needs to know how to behave with a patient. Although people don’t really use the word patient for the person who has OCD. It is important for everyone to understand the person with any mental disorder and behave with them carefully.
This is the difference between a normal person reaction and the OCD person. The motive is to achieve their task of cleaning and if it undone then it does not give them a peace of mind.
The pattern of doing such an unnecessary task every day without fail can become an obstacle in other work or for other family members.
It may sound a simple thing but when put into an action 365 days for more than decades, that would mean wasting time.
Cleaning front passage is acceptable :
When it is dirty.
When there is any occasion and you want everything to look fresh.
Once in a day . At the most, twice a day.
Anything that goes beyond limit, needs an attention.
The OCD patient should learn the methods of listening to others especially the ones who love you.
Other people should not take the pattern of OCD person lightly. The earlier the treatment or counselling to change the daily habits, the easier it is to live the life for all.
Only one point  of Normal Day has been discussed in this chapter. The next points describing Normal Day will be added in the next chapter.
Anxiety is a disorder that can happen anytime to children and adults. It depends on the way a person is brought up and the surrounding people. The negative people are the bad source to develop anxiety. The traumatic events or any unexpected event can be one of the causes. Some physical illness especially the chronic illness has the tendencies to develop an anxiety and panic symptoms. In the similar manner, some mental disorders can also have these symptoms.
Anxiety arises from different causes. For this reason, anxiety is broadly classified into these categories:
1] Generalized Anxiety Disorder
This is a very common disorder that affects daily mundane activities. A person with this disorder has the habit of continuously worrying about everything. They are tensed about each task. They feel tensed without much good reason. They worry about their family members, children’s school, a partner’s job, the financial matter, daily chores, and any occasions or festivals. If one issue is solved, they will have another incoming worrying thoughts in mind. This consistent worrying nature leads their imagination to expect disaster or unpleasant events. They have restless “What if ?“ thoughts leading them to be always alert. This kind of worrisome life, results in a sleep disorder. An unmanaged sleeping hours leads to numerous physical health problems.
2] Panic Disorder
A panic attack is triggered through mental stress or frequent anxiety alarms. This lasts from 20 minutes to hours. This attack occurs once in few days or months or years. It can even happen based on the shocking circumstances. This is often misunderstood as a heart attack. However, a recurrent panic attack can affect routine life. A recurrent panic attack shall not necessary show up all the symptoms. But, the person will have a mild temperature and heart pounds while hearing any loud sounds, violent visuals and quarrels, or a part of phobia symptom.
3] Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
The word post -traumatic explicitly defines its meaning. An individual suffers from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) after facing an unexpected event of life. This can be a loss of loved one. When a person faces any cruel or violent attacks, it is possible to suffer from PTSD. Any loss of artificial but important element of life can also become the cause for PTSD. Sometimes, it is not certain for the person to experience it. Even the person who witnesses terrible events happening to someone else can develop PTSD. Anything related to the traumatic event can trigger back the symptoms. The memories keep flashing back in the mind frequently. This changes the personality and the behavior of a person. An individual begins to look at things differently. Sometimes it is difficult for them to trust others. An untreated PTSD person may find it difficult to live a normal life smoothly due to the flashbacks of events.
4] Separation Anxiety Disorder
It occurs when the person cannot cope up with the emotional relationship management. The fear of living separately from own family or any loved ones is excess than normal behavioral pattern. We have heard the word home-sickness. Home-sickness is a temporary emotion. But, in SAD, a person finds it difficult to survive without family or friends. Usually, they are dependent on their family members. They feel safe around their loved ones. On another hand, they have the thoughts of other person being in danger without them. For this reason, they would like to be around them all the time.
5] Social Anxiety Disorder
An individual with Social Anxiety Disorder will not be comfortable around the people. The social events or gatherings will be a tough thing to attain. Performing activities together in a group can be a stressful thing to do. Eating outside in a restaurant or parties triggers anxiety symptoms. One of the troubling symptom is a speech problem. A person suffering from this kind of anxiety will find it difficult to have a conversation with others. Sometimes their low esteem can also result in slurred speech. With these symptoms, one can feel tensed to carry out casual outgoings . They feel scared of their unpredictable symptoms. They get thoughts of people judging them. They do not want to embarrass themselves by showing up the symptoms.
6] Obsessive Compulsive Disorder -OCD
OCD is about performing the tasks repeatedly. To do these tasks repeatedly, mind is constantly signaling to repeat the tasks. When the same thoughts are being recurrently processed , it develops anxiety. There is a fear whether the particular task is done or not. Even if there is no one to supervise the person, the fear will always exists in the mind.
Phobia is inter-related with anxiety and panic attacks. Phobia of any object or animals can be unavoidable. A person is constantly in thoughts of what if these objects or animals show up? With phobia: one feels cold, heart beat races, and body trembles. Most of the people cry like a child. Some phobias can look like the person is over-reacting. Even if one knows that their behavior is not normal, a phobia is something they cannot overcome easily. The fearful thoughts trigger anxiety. While the person is frequently checking around to not see those things around, any random object can be misinterpreted as the same phobia object. This gives heart pound at that moment.
To add on, anxiety can also occur before traveling plans, while giving presentations, during occasions, in the meetings, or performing any new activity.
We will discuss more on this topic, in the upcoming posts.
Would you like to share your anxiety or panic story here? Do you have any helpful tips to overcome anxiety? It would be great to read your story as well as tips in the comment section. It will be helpful for others.
Thank you for reading. 🙂
Hope you are having a wonderful time.
If not, take rest and restart again.
I am writing this post based on what I observed. I previously wrote this article focusing mainly on Indian bloggers. This time I am updating it by taking into consideration the bloggers around the world.
Blogging has turned out to be the most common thing all around the world. It is also a taboo that only an unemployed people write blogs. But, the truth is even an employed ones love blogging. Earlier, bloggers were considered as only writers platform. Over a period of time, it has turned into a writing personal life. The usage of blogging platform for each one of us differ as per our requirements. Some of us write here to share thoughts or experiences while rest may write related to teaching or business purpose.
It does not feel good to write that most of the Indian bloggers are not really good at appreciating other’s blogs. I can clearly say most of the Indian bloggers are lacking exposure. A few years back, I came in touch with USA & UK group and I happen to understand how hard they are working for getting readers to their blogs. There were few more Indians but, it was really disesteeming to see how those Indians were only interested in sharing their own blogs and not going through others. Everyone started complaining about Indian members and yet these fellows shamelessly continued to exist in the community to get readers only for their own blogs.
Back in those days, Indian bloggers were not doing it well. But in 2019 some of the bloggers are participating. Although the ratio is very low. If there are 10 Indian bloggers then only 4 will actively participate.
(From the observation of a group which was specifically created only for Indian Bloggers and no one else was allowed from another country) When the technique of connecting Indian Bloggers was being started; out of thousands of bloggers, hardly 4 or 5 were actively involved. There are good helping Indian bloggers and definitely, we don’t want to defame them because of some irresponsible bloggers.
Bloggers around the world
In my previous paragraph, I praised other countries in the World. What is the statistics of 2019?
Slowly, others are also failing to help fellow bloggers. Even with a clear idea of the Blogging Planet, not everyone is able to keep up the task of reading others work. We are now able to find that some are participating in the reciprocation but not really completing it . We can see people are just skipping away with the lies of already reciprocated.
SEO is hard to break
We are all aware of the changing SEO techniques and analytics going around. People who were gaining profit through their site are now unable to see the same level of returns. SEO techniques have expanded. The number of blogs in today’s stats is greater than the previous data. Because of this reason, it becomes difficult to stand your article on the first page of search engine. The ranking is unpredictable now unless you have a unique topic. So, everyone definitely needs multi ways of bringing traffic to their blog. The tougher the competition to break the SEO rank, the toughest it is to maintain the connections through social media network.
Networking is vital
Blogging is not at all easier than sayings. We need to spend time thinking and writing. The next step is to follow up on the SEO guidelines. Then, the person has to start connecting with the people. We can not just post and leave. No one is going to see unless it’s shared. No one is going to see unless it’s shared 100 plus more times. The content should be the best. But, just writing content won’t work anymore.
You need to connect with people to let them know why they should read your articles. You have to read other people blogs so that they read yours. You need to credit other people work so that they think of giving feedback to your blogs too. Unfortunately, the sharing platform has reduced. People are not reading articles on previous shared platforms. Some of the platforms have also started charging for uploading a blog sample. Presently, sharing is mainly limited to Pinterest, Instagram, and Twitter to receive a good response.
Respect other’s work
As mentioned earlier bloggers are the writers, exception sellers and photographers. As per my observation, we are failing as writers community. Somewhere in the competition world, we have lost the true meaning of a writer. Thousands of bloggers have moved to their own site. Of course in the world of competition, who don’t want a personal site. But, amidst lies few bloggers who can’t afford Domain & Hosts. Hence, they proceed with a free site. Such free sites usually lose the ranking in SEO.
Every blogger wants to get attention from readers but, are they giving back the same attention to other bloggers? Are the contents appropriate or it’s only about copying someone else’s content? We see people who write gibberish, hence, do not hold any meaningful content but still do their best through Marketing Strategy.
As bloggers, one must be open to appreciations as well as criticism. Many writers fail to accept criticism. They find it aggressive. Critics will help us improve and leaving a true feedback will help the person to come up with a better article. We need to uplift each other to achieve our goals.
Around the world, bloggers are usually amongst these 7 categories:
1] To earn only through Ads, content is secondary
Yes, everyone needs to earn. Blogging through affiliate links, sponsorship and ads display is helpful for many people. Blogging can definitely act as the only source or as an alternative for earning purpose.
2]To get fame
Some fellows have misunderstood that blogging is one of the steps to become popular.
3]To get readers only for own blog
4]Let everyone read my diary
5]Blogging is what anyone can do so I will also do it. Write anything !!!
6]Writing is what I love to do and don’t care whether I get readers or not.
7]And there are another bunch of people who think once they have started blogging, they can publish their own book too. P.S. publishing book is a good thing as long as you are not naive & your content attract readers.
As the quote says,“If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time (or the tools) to write. Simple as that”
I am thankful to the people who had been taking out time from their busy schedules and genuinely helping other writers with their honest feedback.
“GIVE & TAKE”
The amount of time you spend in sharing your links on all social platforms, try to give half of that time to read other’s blogs too.
” A coterie of writers can lead to a better writing world.” Everyone has to come forward and be involved actively in encouraging others by keeping everyone’s work alive.